In our previous entry we published “Ten Lessons They Should Learn in Girls’ Comics – but Don’t”. You know, lessons they just don’t learn in girls’ comics when if they had, they might have saved themselves (and everyone else) a lot of trouble, or gotten away with what they were up to. Well, the lessons don’t end there. There are so many lessons they should learn that now we present this followup: “Ten Lessons They Should Learn in Girls’ Comics – but Don’t: Volume 2”.
1: Beware the Greeks, even when they offer gifts.
Image credit: “Tears of a Clown”, Jinty 1980.
2: Girls are not statues.
Image credit: “Stefa’s Heart of Stone”, Jinty 1976.
3: Freezing up because of grief only leads to more grief.
Image credit: “Stefa’s Heart of Stone”, Jinty 1976.
4: Parents who expect consideration from their children should show them consideration too.
Image credit: “Hard Times for Helen”, Judy 1984-85.
5: Don’t bring strange things home.
Image credit: “What’s Wrong with Rhona?”, Tammy 1977.
6: When they warn you to get rid of something, get rid of it.
Image credit: “Secret of the Skulls”, Tammy 1976.
7: When they warn you to leave well alone, leave well alone.
Image credit: “Leaves in the Wind”, Tammy 1977-78.
8: Don’t suffer in silence.
Image credit: “Witch!”, Bunty 1991.
9: Always destroy something suspiciously evil in the first place.
Image credit: “Secret of the Skulls”, Tammy 1976.
10: If you’re out to commit the perfect crime, don’t make your game too obvious.
Have you ever noticed there are lessons they just don’t learn in girls’ comics? If they had, they might have saved themselves (and everyone else) a lot of trouble, or gotten away with what they were up to. But they didn’t because they didn’t learn their lesson, or they didn’t learn it in time. To give you the idea, we present our list of ten lessons they should learn in girls’ comics – but don’t.
Ambition can’t create talent.
Source: In Her Mother’s Shoes, Strange Story from Tammy
2. And magic objects/forces can’t create genuine talent (instilling confidence is fine).
Source: In Her Mother’s Shoes, Strange Story from Tammy
3. If you’re out to commit the perfect crime, leave nothing to chance.
Source: Olympia Jones, from Tammy
4. It’s okay to say “no” when you need to.
Source: Hard Times for Helen, from Judy
5. Quit while you’re ahead.
Source: When Harry Dumped Sally, from Bunty
6. Comparisons don’t work.
Source: That Girl Next Door! Mandy Picture Story Library #105
7. Especially when they are unfair.
Source: Hard Times for Helen, from Judy
8. Your daughter does not have to take after you just because she’s a [family name].
Source: The Last Esmeraldo, from Misty
9. When you say you know best, you show everyone you don’t.
Source: The Trysting Tree, Strange Story from Tammy
10. The days when parents decided their children’s careers are long gone.
We’ve had two instalments of “25 Things You May (or May Not) Have Noticed in Girls’ Comics”. You know, the ones that start with:
“We have all noticed certain things in girls’ serials. Things about plot, character and setting that always seem to crop up and we comment on them a lot. Then again, there are other things about plot, character and setting that always crop up as well, but we hardly even notice them. At least, not until someone else points them out.”
Well, here we are again, with:
25 Things You May (or May Not) Have Noticed in Girls’ Comics: Volume 3
1: We get plenty of serials with spooky moggies…
Image credit: “Cat!”, M&J, 1991.
2: … but not many with spooky doggies.
Image credit: “Whistle and I’ll Come…” Misty 1978-79.
3: Antagonists who trick protagonists into signing contracts don’t make sure they are legally valid.
Image credit: “The Stables Slave”, Tammy 1972-73.
4: When you count on something, there’s always something you didn’t count on…
Image credit: “Bad Luck Barbara”, Mandy 1985.
5: We all laud the one true friend who stands by the unfortunate protagonist through thick and thin…
Image credit: “Move Over, Maria”, Bunty 1994.
6: … yet we all wonder why the hell the true friend sticks by the protagonist when she’s a pain in the butt and nobody else likes her!
Image credit: “Snobby Shirl the Shoeshine Girl!”, Jinty 1976.
7: The main villain suddenly reforms if they cross an even bigger villain.
Image credit: “Sadie in the Sticks”, Tammy & June 1974.
8: Parents with a problem child seem to think a schoolgirl and change of scene will be the instant magic cure.
Image credit: “Be Nice To Nancy!”, Judy 1989-1990.
9: We don’t get many girls’ serials where the main antagonist is a boy.
Image credit: “Bullied!”, M&J 1996.
10: So often is a magic object more trouble than it’s worth, even if it does have its uses.
Image credit: “Topsy Turvey”, Mandy 1985.
11: Aliens with advanced science often have poor scientific methods.
Image credit: “The Human Zoo”, Jinty 1978-79.
12: About 99% of the time, protagonists/antagonists out for revenge find out they were mistaken.
Image credit: “Down with St Desmond’s!”, Bunty 1977-78.
13: The plot always sets you up to beware of girls who look so sweet and angelic you could use them for artificial sweeteners.
Image credit: “Angela Angel-Face”, Jinty 1980.
14: The problem in a dystopian world of the future is nothing the 20th century can’t fix.
Image credit: “Trixie of 2087”, Debbie PSL #107, 1987.
15: Nobody but the protagonist seems to act if an animal is being mistreated until the final episode.
Image credit: “Olympia Jones”, Tammy 1976-1977.
16: An award, prize or big win always turns out to be a jinx – unless it’s won at the end of the story.
Image credit: “The £100,000 Headache”, Debbie PSL #33, 1980.
17: They never let you get away with deception, even if your reasons for it are sympathetic/noble.
Image credit: “Ashamed of Her Mum”, Debbie PSL #100, 1986.
18: There are plenty of girls’ serials with bully teachers…
Image credit: “Hard Times for Helen”, Judy 1984-85.
19: … but not many with bullied teachers.
Image credit: “Patsy on the Warpath”, June 1969.
20: So often everyone seems to conveniently lose all memory of something weird happening except the protagonist and all trace of it disappears at the end of the story – even when there is no reason for it.
In our previous blog entry we listed 25 Things You May (or May Not) Have Noticed in Girls’ Comics. You know, the one that went:
“We have all noticed certain things in girls’ serials. Things about plot, character and setting that always seem to crop up and we comment on them a lot. Then again, there are other things about plot, character and setting that always crop up as well, but we hardly even notice them. At least, not until someone else points them out.”
But it doesn’t end at 25. Oh no, you wouldn’t expect that, would you? No, of course not! Now we present:
25 Things You May (or May Not) Have Noticed in Girls’ Comics: Volume 2
1: Parents fail to stand up for themselves at the worst moments… and with the worst consequences.
Image credit: “Down with St Desmond’s!”, Bunty 1977-78.
2: The lengths overprotective parents go to to protect their offspring are so ridiculous they’re laughable – yet the consequences are not.
Image credit: “Namby Pamby”, Tammy 1983.
3: If all else fails, bring in a deus ex machina to redeem the mess the protagonist is in.
Image credit: “Down with St Desmond’s”, Bunty 1977-78.
4: Protagonists making claims of harassment often turn out to be faking the whole thing…
Image credit: “Pam of Pond Hill”, Tammy & Princess 1984.
5: … yet real harassment/ bullying often seems to go unnoticed by those in authority.
Image credit: “Tears of a Clown”, Jinty 1980.
6: We are surprised if the school tries to sort out a bullying situation before the end of the story…
Image credit: “They Call Me a Coward!”, June 1971.
7: … but we aren’t at all surprised if they sort it out at the end of the story.
Image credit: “Pam of Pond Hill”, Tammy 1983.
8: Schemers plotting to get rid of someone keep failing to do so, no matter how much they discredit them (except when they are required to temporarily succeed before being found out).
Image credit: “That Bad Bettina!”, Mandy 1985.
9: Parents never listen to warnings that something weird’s about to strike the family.
Image credit: “The Sentinels”, Misty 1978.
10: Guess who cops the worst of it.
Image credit: “The Sentinels” Misty 1978.
11: We get lots of serials about World War II and fighting the Nazis – but it’s rare to see Hitler in any size, shape or form.
13: For some reason we always know when parents have put the wrong person in charge of their daughter while they are away – yet the parent never realises it themselves before they put that person in charge.
We have all noticed certain things in girls’ serials. Things about plot, character and setting that always seem to crop up and we comment on them a lot. Then again, there are other things about plot, character and setting that always crop up as well, but we hardly even notice them. At least, not until someone else points them out. To give you the idea of what we mean, we present:
25 Things You May (or May Not) Have Noticed in Girls’ Comics
1: The protagonist is always an only child, except when the plot requires her to have siblings.
Image credit: “Pam of Pond Hill”, Tammy 1984
2: The protagonist endures even the worst abuse imaginable rather than upset dear old mummy and daddy by telling them what’s going on.
Image credit: “Witch!”, Bunty 1991.
3: Problem parents always make the wrong assumptions about their daughter until the end of the story.
Image credit: “Hard Times for Helen”, Judy 1984-85
4: If the daughter speaks out against it, it’s not until the climax.
Image credit: “Hard Times for Helen”, Judy 1984-85.
5: Parents sense they have a problem with their daughter – but don’t do anything about it except shout the house down.
Image credit: “Waves of Fear”, Jinty 1979.
6: And then they discover they handled it all wrong – but not before it’s led to something totally preventable.
Image credit: “Waves of Fear”, Jinty 1979.
7: The protagonist doesn’t write to a problem page for help, though there are plenty of them in girls’ comics.
Image credit: Problem page, Girl (second series), 1981.
8: The order and favourite story coupons they always tell you to fill out ruin the comic for future collectors because they leave holes in it.
Favourite story coupon, Tammy 1981.
9: (Except when the plot allows it), child welfare’s never around when you really need ’em…
Image credit: “Bella at the Bar”, Tammy 1974.
10: …but alway stick their noses in when you least want ’em.
Image credit: “Bella at the Bar”, Tammy 1974.
11: No boys in girls’ adventures, though men are allowed…
Image credit: “The Human Zoo”, Jinty 1978-79.
12: …except very young boys, mostly kid brothers.
Image credit: “Somewhere over the Rainbow”, Jinty 1978-79.
13: A lot of exonerations are contrived because we simply must have happy endings.
Image credit: “The Black and White World of Shirley Grey”, Tammy 1981
14: Advanced aliens never developed the know-how that could have saved them – but less advanced humans have.
Image credit: “The Human Zoo”, Jinty, 1978-79.
15: Serials about girls sent to reform / special school are either sent unjustly or only need a little toning down…
Image credit: “Merry at Misery House”, Jinty 1974-75.
16: …never because they’re utter toerags who really deserve it!
Image credit: “Be Nice to Nancy!”, Judy 1989-1990
17: The weather’s always fine, except when the plot demands otherwise.
Image credit: “The Human Zoo”, Jinty 1978-79.
18: Historical accuracy is not a strong point in girls’ comics.
Image credit: “Sit It Out, Sheri”, Tammy 1976.
19: Protagonists / antagonists don’t do their homework before they embark on an evil campaign – which would have told them it was a complete waste of time.
Image credit: “Witch!”, Bunty 1991.
20: No boys in sight, no matter what world you land in.
Image credit: “Worlds Apart”, Jinty, 1981.
21: Ye Editor does not pick up all the goofs – but we do.
“The Sentinels”, Misty 1978.
22: We groan at how so many villains get off too lightly at the end of the story!
Image credit: “The Four Friends at Spartan School”, Tammy 1971-1972.
23: In serials about difficult mother-daughter relationships, there’s never a father who could intervene.
Image credit: “No Haven for Hayley”, Tammy 1981.
24: In serials about a shrinking parent, it’s always the mother.
Image credit: “Mary’s Mini Mum”, M&J, 1991.
25: Protagonists don’t realise the obvious until it’s pointed out to them.
